I swear, if I have to keep enduring this lifevest alarming, I'm going to have a reason for it, bc it's going to give me a heart attack!!! It's after 1 in the morning. I changed the battery in my lifevest like I do every night, walked in the kids' rooms to check on them one last time, and got back to my room, and the freaking alarm went off. I seriously cannot deal with this any longer, my nerves are shot! So, I pressed the buttons and it said that treatment has been delayed-gee thanks, bc I was doing just fine before the shrill of you occurred. Then, it went off again. It shrilled at me, and that nagging voice was calling out, "patient respond, bystanders stand back". What the heck! I'm ok, or at least I was before it scared me half to death! So since I had this thing happen Mon, I knew that since I pressed my buttons, I didn't have to call the doctor yet, just the lifevest people. They can look up my monitor and see why it went off. So I called. He looked at the alarm, and said that my leads were probably sliding. Well, I have my vest as tight as I can get it, and ding, ding, ding...I've lost weight, so my vest needs to be replaced for a smaller one. That should help save my last nerve when my alarm goes off for non-heart related reasons. I asked the doctor when I can go back to work. I mean, I'm married to a teacher. Teachers are so underpaid for what they do, that it's pathetic. Our stinking government cuts education first, all the time. They should cut that last bc kids need their education and teachers need to take care of their families (and themselves). Anyway, that's another post altogether. My point is that Rianna's birthday is coming up, then Christmas, and then Gage's birthday. So I'd like my paychecks again. I don't get disability at all, I get no financial anything at all while I'm out. Since I'm considered part time at work although I work(ed) 32-40 hrs per week, I don't have benefits, hence, no short-term disability. I'm lucky to have such a great husband who's an awesome father to our kids. I think about it all the time, how lucky I am. I see friends and family who don't have the support from a spouse the way I do, or their kids' father (or mother) is not in their lives. It's sad. And I make myself remember to never take it for granted, ever. When I was going through everything, David told me that I'd have to be strong so that I could be here for him and the kids. But I know that he'd be able to handle it if something happened to me, I just don't think I could do it without him. The doctor said I can't go back to work until I get the results from my cardiac MRI. Well, my MRI just got scheduled, FINALLY. It's Friday. So I'm thinking that I'll have the MRI then, and maybe my doctor will decide Monday if I can go back to work. This MRI will determine if I have to have the defibrillator implanted. If not, all should be fine. This should be my last test of my heart to determine if I can go back to work. So fingers crossed!!!!
Oh-and Gage was supposed to have his echo done last week, but the doctor had an emergency and had to reschedule. He goes Wednesday, so here's hoping that it doesn't get cancelled and it comes back normal. I don't want him to go through this. So if y'all can please keep him in your prayers for me, I'd appreciate it. Pins and needles til then...
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